Halloween 2012

Halloween is definitely one of my favorite holidays. I love the opportunity to be crafty and have all sorts of fun without having to give out gifts or recieve gifts from others... besides an insane amount of candy =0) This year we were SOOO fortunate to have an absolutely amazing time. And despite time running out and us not making it to the pumpkin patch (per Nora's choice) or me making their costumes (also Nora's choice) we still managed to attend three Halloween Party's not including our own! Crazy!

 Here I am reading MY favorite Halloween Story at our church Halloween Party. I have been the coordinator for this party for the past two years and I absolutely LOVE doing it. Nothing like throwing a party that is a TON of fun and not having to spend a penny of your own money =0)

 Here Nora and I are at Miss Amanda's Halloween Party. Despite me feeling like tar, it was a great time. Notice my name tag from the church party earlier. Nora made it, and I guess in a four-year-old's eyes, despite her knowing my true name, "Mom" is good enough for a name tag =0)

 Here Nora is making a Monster at our Halloween party. The girl might've gotten her way on me NOT making her Halloween costume and she might've gotten her way on not going to the pumpkin patch, but darn it, I was going to sneak some craftiness into this holiday some how. I might be biased, but I think they turned out pretty darn cute!

Here are my cheerleaders. Getting a picture of these two together is IMPOSSIBLE. Thinking a call to our picture Goddess, Kari is in our near future!

The best stop of the night! Miss Amanda's. My girls absolutely adore her, her sweet girl, and even Mr. Joe... or uh, Mr. Dickerson =0)

 

 
Like everything... all good things must come to an end. Thankfully (for the kiddos) the result of this holiday means LOTS of yummy candy for many, many days to come! Halloween 2012 was definitely a success. We look forward to seeing what Halloween 2013 may bring!!

You Say What?!?!

Today Reese's speech lady came. Not only did she come, but she came bearing news that I am excited to hear, but scared about all at the same time. She recommended that we get Reese into a program for kids with speech needs that is pretty intensive. "Like a preschool for kids with Special Needs" were her words. The way I am handling this news has come somewhat surprisingly to me... I guess I never really had grasped the concept that Reese indeed does have "special needs" or that her "needs" are significant enough to warrant having to spend significant amounts of time away from me in a setting to address these needs at the ripe age of two. Coming from a Mama who has worked with people who fit into this category my entire adult life, I think I have both an advantage ( I am all too familiar with all the terminology, treatments, etc) and a disadvantage (I have seen the worst of the worst). More than anything I think it makes me sad to think that somebody will be taking my baby away, forcing her to do things she does not enjoy at all in hopes that she can overcome this nasty nasty developmental disability that she has.
Like everything in life, I can choose to be sad, or I can choose to accept the news and fight for the best. Since she is one of the loves of my life, I have no choice but to be strong... so as bad as it hurts, I guess once again, it is time to put my big girl panties on, suck up the news and move on... Life is definitely not easy all of the time, but once again Im gonna have to lean on my motto for life... "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me" and know that in the end everything we do will be so worth it. After all she is a pretty darn special girl =0)

My Sweet Nora

I love this girl.

She truly is a dream child. Don't get me wrong, she, like all of us, has her moments, but, overall she is pretty awesome. There are not many places I go that people don't have good things to say about her. She is silly. She is smart. She is determined. She is driven to learn, but most of all she is sweet. She is such an old soul in a young girls body. Watching her interact with her friends is so much fun, but watching her care for her younger friends is even better. She truly LOVES them. She wants to care for them, cries when they don't come over and states that we are NOT allowed to have anymore "Miller babies" because then we wouldn't have room in the car for her "little friends". Sweet, sweet Nora I hope you always remain the caring, loving, "old soul" that you are today.

Sometimes Reality Hurts...

Sometimes reality hurts. As Reese gets older and continues to miss milestone after milestone of speech development it hurts even more. It hurts when I see peers her own age clearly communicating their needs and it hurts even more when my dear friend's little ones who are several months younger pass Reese in her ability to speak. It hurts the most when I see what should be happening in writing, such as when the Parent's as Teacher lady comes and gives me handouts that state things like this:

-Says several single words (by fifteen to eighteen months)

-Uses simple phrases (by eighteen to twenty-four months)

-Uses two- to four-word sentences

-Repeats words overheard in conversation

Reality really sinks in then... Crap, my child is doing NONE of these =0(

Most of all, the unknown hurts. The unknown of how well she may or may not overcome this speech deficit, rather or not the speech deficit will cause other learning disabilities and how, long-term, this will all effect her in her daily life. Often guilt sets in and for just one moment I think I could be doing more, that it was something I did wrong to have caused the problem....maybe I didn't read to her enough, etc... Then I remember that we have another child, whom I treat exactly the same, and who is brilliant. I am thankful for this and I am thankful that despite these challenges, my children are the best gift a Mama could've ever asked for!   

 

Tuesdays

We here at the Miller's are busy, busy people. It seems like everyday has something on the schedule that gets us out of the house bright and early. Since making the decision to quit working, one of the things I thought I would enjoy the most was the lack of having to rush around in the morning. Because this does not happen often, I always try my best to make Tuesdays and Thursdays be our no rush days.. we wake up in the morning, may or may not get dressed and just go with the flow of the day. I always find it interesting to see what we end up doing when there is nothing on the schedule... This morning was a perfect example. I was downstairs cleaning up when out of nowhere Nora came down fully dressed in her apron and chef hat proclaiming that she wanted to make cookies. Since this Mama is in love with sweets there was no arguing there... within minutes the brownie mix was out and we were going to town. Ahhh I love mornings like these. Sometimes I think we need more of them!

 By the way, when Nora and I were busy baking, Reese was up to her own fun. Sneaking smarties is always a favorite of hers... She doesn't look one bit ornery, does she?

Things That Make Me Tick...

This Girl!!

Never in a million years could I have ever imagined I would love something so much as I do this girl. Don't get me wrong, I love both of my girls equally, but the funny thing is is that I love each of them for different reasons.

 This girl is my wild child. I LOVE her go get em attitude, her fearlessness, her sweet, sweet caring personality and her desire to always give the biggest hugs possible, even if sometimes they are a bit too much.

I love her ability to overcome her own adversities and trek along as though nothing is wrong. This girl rocks my world each and everyday. I cannot imagine living life without her in it and I cannot wait to see what the future entails for her. I can only imagine what she may become =0)

Dirty Laundry

Sometimes life isnt all that great. Everywhere I turn everybody talks about how great their lives are, how wonderful their kids are and how clean their house is... Well guess what? It's not that way at the Miller household. Yes, I am thankful. Very very thankful. But guess what? I sacrifice a clean house, (sometimes)a clean self, folded clothes and decently prepared dinners on a daily basis for making sure that my kids have the best time possible each and everyday. And guess what else? Sometimes I lose my shit... I yell at my kids, I lose my patience, I say bad things about my friends and family and on really bad days I might just tell my husband I HATE him... of course the next day I wake up, pretend that nothing happened and profess my love to him =0) You see, we here at the Millers are a real family. We all make mistakes. We all get irritated, and we don't always get along.
I spend too much, Ryan does too little (despite the fact that I tend to forget he works no less than a 10 hr day at least 5 days a week) Nora talks too much, and well, Reese in addition to being two, has this thing called apraxia that makes everything just a little bit more difficult. Despite all of this we cohabitate, love each other and wouldn't trade our family for anything else in the world.
My point you may ask? Well, its that I am tired of seeing everybody's perfect life portrayed all over the various social media sources. I mean, come on? Is everyday really as peachy as you make it out to be, or do you too lose your shit sometimes?

32 Aint So Bad =0)

What Makes Me Tick...

Lately I have been feeling very, very thankful. Thankful that in the 32 years of my life, that my life has become so darn good. As I look around, those who are near and dear to me are sufferring in ways that I have never thought would happen to them.
I have a friend, whose husband was hurt in war, a Mama who is enduring quite the ride with cancer, and another person who has settled in life for less than the best. All of these things make my heart hurt but at the same time make me realize just how precious the life I have been given is and how LUCKY I am to have it so good. My life is great! Looking back I am sooo thankful that in the times when my life could have gone the wrong direction, something told me to go another way. When I was ill, that I overcame the obstacles of it, gave myself a second chance and believed in myself. That when I was lost, feeling lonely and thinking I would never find the husband of my dreams, out of nowhere came my college roommate whom I NEVER thought I would marry!
Since then, life has only gotten better! This man has given me the world. He has endured my moodiness, dealt with my inadequecies, been there to help birth our two children, raised them to be beautiful, caring little girls and set an example of what a Daddy should be.... So, for my 32nd birthday, I really don't want anything except for the people in my life to be as thankful for all that they have been given. Afterall, this world is a pretty depressing place IF you let it be.. but each and every day there is hope, sunshine and somebody out there who cares!

Weekend Round-Up

So a little late is better than never, right? This weekend was one we have been needing for A LONG TIME.. finally not ONE committment we had to tend to. Finally we had a weekend where we could kick back, relax and do as we pleased, and to top it all off, Grandma and Grandpa offered to have the kids for a night. We jumped on the opportunity with no real plans in mind and went with it. It ended up being just the weekend we needed. We browsed around the Plaza (in the rain.. we didn't care, we didnt have kids) =) ate lunch at PF Changs, went to the movies, stopped to get cheesecake, slept through the night uninterupted, skipped church, went out to eat breakfast without having to get two kiddos ready and hope that the line is short so they don't lose their shit due to being over-hungry, etc. It was FANTASTIC.... and totally reminded me of how our weekends went prior to life with two kids =0)

Friday Sayings...

In our car we have three carseats. One for Nora, one for Reese and one for whatever random friend we might be toting along for the day =0) On the way to school this morning out of nowhere Nora said, "Mama, we can't have another baby". I said, "why not Nora"? She responded, "because then we wouldn't be able to watch Payton and Bridgey". I said, well Nora just because we have another baby doesnt mean we would have to stop having our friends over". Nora said, "yes, Mama it does. If we have another baby, then we won't have a seat for our friends in our car".
I guess the sudden conversation answered two things for me... Not much has changed on Nora's feelings of having another sibling (She has made it clear since Reese was born that she does not want another brother OR sister, Reese is enough) and that she indeed LOVES having her little friends over. So much so that having another sibling should NOT interfere with that!
I guess if we take the advice of the four-year-old in the house, we won't be adding to this Miller family anytime soon =0)

Two

Reese had her two year doctor appointment today and despite the two shots and one finger prick she handled it like a trooper.. that is until her Daddy asked about her ouchies when putting pajamas on later that night. Suddenly it must've hurt really bad because the girl burst out into tears! I guess she must've realized then that she could've gotten a lot of attention for those ouchies and hadnt quite milked it for all that it was worth =0)
At the doctor her stats were as followed:
25 pounds, 2 oz (26th percentile)
35 inches  (75th percentile)

Life Has a Funny Way...

of putting things into perspective. I have been struggling lately with life. Feeling inadequate, rushed and overwhelmed. Stressed about things that I know I should not stress about but can't seem to shake away... and then something happens. Something terrible. Something nobody ever wants to have happen to them in their lives or to anybody they love... A family who I love dearly and who has been my best friend for many, many years faces tragedy... the husband, the daddy, the son of this family gets wounded while at war. A reality I knew could happen with the duties of his job, but never thought would. Ignorance maybe? Maybe not. Either way the stresses of my life have been put into perspective and the continued thoughts of what I want for my family have been put in the limelight.
So with that I thought here is what I think I want my house to become... I want my home to be warm and comforting, I want it to be a place where all kids feel welcomed, loved and treated like they are my own. I want my kids to feel like this is their home as well as mine. I want the chaos of lots of children in my home. I want friends who enjoy spending time with my family, I want my kids to know that they truly do not have control over their own lives, that their life truly is a gift given to them from above and that at any moment life can change. I want them to know not to ever take anything for granted and to appreciate all that they have. I want them to be loving, caring, Christian kids. I want to hear please and thank-you and I love-you's so often I get sick of it...I want happiness, stability and a worry free home... I want open conversations and a sense that it is just fine to be the "you" YOU want to be... I want all of these things.... and I want to never quit thanking the lord for the Daddy my children have...because, afterall, he is a pretty awesome man!

A Little Chalenge for the Bloggy Blog...

I have been in a rut lately..not taking pics of all the fun happening in the Miller household, not blogging about it, and just watching life go by (too quickly) without documenting it... SO, I have decided I am trying something new... Starting now I am going to try and follow the schedule I just came up with.. Monday will be weekend round-up Tuesday will be "What Makes Me Tick" Wednesday will be "wordless wednesday"-pics only) Thursday will be "Thursday Funday" and Friday will be Silly Sayings... Wish me luck... maybe with a plan I will actually get something documented a little more frequently =0)

House Hunting

House hunting is hard work.. House hunting is even harder when you love the home you're in, but know it is not your forever home. Thus is the case for this Miller family. To me, this is home:

This place is not just a house, it is where we have made many, many memories. It is on a lovely street with the best people we could ask for right across the way. Crazy as it may sound, it reminds me so much of the house I grew up... granted it has quite a few more square feet =0) I think moving this time is so difficult because I know how hard the transiton was last time. I am very fearful that even though we will be moving to the same city, likely just a few miles away, (if that) it will not be our home on Briar.Moving seems to be even more difficult when a certain four-year-old lets you know over and over again that this is where she wants to live forever...  in her mind this IS her last home.. and to be quite honest, I get it... Why do we need anything more? Why must one live with the mentality that the grass is always greener...in a bigger home, a nicer car, a higher paying job, etc? Because afterall, I really do not believe money can buy happiness... especially when we already have all that we need and then some livng in our house on Briar Street!

32

WOW! It is hard to believe that in a few short weeks I will be 32. How this happened I do not know. I think about how sad I was when my baby turned two, and I wonder how my Mom must feel having her baby turn 32. 32 years that seem like a blur.. Time really does go fast. 32 years of livng life, learning lessons, some hard, some easy, and enjoying almost every minute of it. 32 years of many changes, many opportunities and most of all many things that I never ever dreamed my life would become. Would you have asked me 15 years ago what I thought my life would be like when I was "grown-up" Im not sure I could have ever imagined it would be this good. My life is GRAND. I have not one single need in life. Not one. I have it all. I have a hard working, loving husband, two beautiful baby girls, a beautiful home and awesome, awesome friends. My cup runneth over and I am sooo thankful for all of these things. I hope the next 32 years are just as awesome as the first 32 have been!!

She May Say Mean Things, BUT....

She is really darn cute, and her sister, well, I think the picture says it all...Gonna be a handful =0)

No Good, Smelly, Stupid Mommy!

Wow! It has been a morning around the Miller household. Nora has been a bit trying for quite some time lately, and honestly, our life has been too full and busy, so I am thinking this may have a part in her innapropriate behaviors of not listening, being rude and just being downright defiant. Experiencing this with her has somewhat taken this Mama by surprise because prior to a few months ago, she was anything BUT that. Today, however, her behavior was like icing on the cake. We needed to get to a local restaurant to pick up a lunch and deliver it to her school for a teachers birthday and so I was trying to get her and her sister showered and ready to go. After getting me SOAKING wet while bathing her (on purpose my you) she refused to put her clothes on. Once overcoming that obstacle we made it downstairs to put on shoes where she decided to let me know that I was a no good stupid Mommy. I have no idea where she even heard the word stupid, or how she knows what it means... Sad thing is I had lost my cool, she knew it and quite frankly I may very well have been acting "stupid". After getting the shoes on and me doing everything in my power to keep cool we made it into the car. I decided that since we were in the car she would have no choice but to listen to me and so I started in on how I was very dissapointed in the way she was acting lately and that it made me sad that we weren't getting along. I told her that if she couldn't be a kind person that we would have to go and talk to our priest, Father Bill and let him know that she was not being kind to others. She looked at me seriously and said "no thank-you, I'll be good". Not five minutes later we were almost to the restaurant when she said, "something smells in this car" I said, "what do you think it is'' to which she replied "its you. you smell yucky and you are stupid". Lovely, just lovely! So apparently the fear of God or talking to the priest wasn't efficient and I have officially ran out of tricks from the bucket... Guess I will be spending rest time this afternoon refreshing my skills from love and logic and researching effective ways to handle a defiant, somewhat rude, way too honest, non-listening four-year-old!